Moving on...

“Moving on”, personally I was one of the biggest fans of moving on. I‘ve always promoted a positive attitude and the idea of letting go of the past. In my personal life moving on was never easy but I tried to do it as much as I could. I try to think that I have moved on, I act as if I have moved on. Even though in reality some facts cannot be overlooked and some moments can never be erased or forgotten.
So, basically I loved the idea of moving on, I believed in the idea of moving on and I certainly was happy trying to move on, but then something changed.

“What is worse than grief is its disappearance” *

When I first read this, I totally understood what it meant. It went right through all my pretenses and settled in the deepest place in my mind. I knew exactly what it meant. I’ve felt it, I’ve tried to ignore it but also I’ve acknowledged it. There can be something that is worse than grief and sadness, its called numbness. Moving on is the healthiest thing anyone could do, I totally agree but everything comes at a price.


Usually, when you try to move on that means that something painful happened. It’s probably associated with someone important in your life too. Everything around you is encouraging you to move on and put yourself out of your own misery. You spend the following days focusing all your energy on moving on. You try to kill every thought and every memory that hurts you. You fall into the pretense that everything is okay and that you are okay. Until one day it’s not a pretense anymore, you have really moved on.


You now mean it when you say that you are fine. The things that you used to avoid now mean nothing to you. That painful memory is now gone and it took some pieces of you with it. Forgetting is indeed a blessing. It does relief you from the pain of remembering hurtful memories but when forgetting changes into merely being numb, moving on is not so promising anymore.


Sometimes moving on doesn’t mean only getting over some sad memory, it might mean letting go of some part of you that you used to love, it might mean letting go of someone that used to mean something important to you. It means much more than just pushing away hurtful memories.


So next time you think it’s time to move on, take a moment to think of the pieces of yourself that you will lose. Pay attention so you don’t fall into the numbness of trying to move on. Try to move on without losing the things you loved about yourself. Once you’ve moved on, you can never go back.

"ليس ابشع شيئ الحزن و لكن اختفاء الحزن" *

قصة "انا الملك جئت" بهاء طاهر

Inspired by a post in the following blog:
http://hadouta.blogspot.com/